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Describe Your Grief

Tom Hawkins

I am driving a back road

where there are still farms

fenced cattle, tobacco barns,

I can't describe my grief,

unless it's like marching

into a lost war, folding clothes by numbers,

waiting in rank for breakfast

beneath the steamy electric lights

before dawn, crawling in a cave

that hasn't been mapped.

I round a curve and see two birds

flapping in the road.

One has been hit

by a car, and its mate

flutterrs just above,

wild to inspire

its fallen partner's flight.

When Anna was ill,

I would have seen her as the fallen bird,

injured in the road, as I hovered,

watching her struggles,

urging her to fly on broken wings.

But now she is gone,

with our marathon conversations,

her startling questions.

And I don't know

which of those two birds

I am.

get rid of your junk mail

HERE

Mark Twain spins words like I churn my thoughts: eloquent and forceful. Unlike my thoughts his statements often ring true. If I'm in the right mood there is nothing finer than a witty twainism. I've stumbled upon several recently. Here are a few:

"There are two kinds of people: those that think there are two kinds and those that don't."

“All generalizations are false, including this one.”

Twenty-First Century Waterfall

No Country For Old Men

There are a bevy of movies I save to see when Sara is on call or otherwise occupied. Movies that would be of little or no interest to her or, more importantly, movies that are too violent. Sara has Friday and Sunday call so I got No Country For Old Men in anticipation of some time in solitude.

I've heard mixed reviews of the movie. Most people disliked at least the ending. Some people found the theme profound.

I'll watch it again and provide a full critique but, after a first watch, the movie struck me as a classic. Amazing one liners, deep abiding characterization, and themes that make me pleased to witness such great art.

One exchange that provided me with something to chew on occurred a ways into the movie. One character has another in a compromising position and inquires, "If this is where your rule has gotten you then what good is your rule?" While the question does have a specific context, this question one we all could ponder. Sort of like a Zen koan or a parable from scripture.

If how we live our lives ultimately leads to death (all of our lives lead to this), then what does that say about our lives and how we live them? What does this say about our code of conduct? If everything leads to the same end then how do we evaluate how we live?

I'll end with another sublime one liner:

"I'm just looking for what is coming"

"But no one ever sees that."